Sad

Next week my babies are turning two. I keep getting depressed and sad thinking that my babies are growing up. Sometimes I want them to grow quickly so I can get past things like when they put a finger in their diaper and find poop or when they throw tantrums over the most simple things. But at the same time they are my babies and I want them to be my babies for a long time. The time is going so fast! For me birthdays are now an indicator of how quickly my kids are growing and changing.

The other thing that makes me sad is that we live in an area with basically no family and we have few friends because I pretty much stay at home all of the time and on Sundays both Darin and I serve in the primary. We don't have anyone near us to help celebrate things like this with our kids. It would be nice to live by more family and friends. I am convinced that if we do move back to be close to our families I want to live up north more in the country. Who knows if that will ever happen, but at least there is hope for more support in the future.

Writing this is making me more depressed so I will leave with a positive note. For the twins birthday we ordered them an adorable crabbie sandbox and it arrived today. I am so excited to let them play with it. Also, we are going to have a lot of family visiting us this summer especially around the time of the new baby's arrival. The kids are going to love all of the attention and I am going to love being around family!